Um…I’m not going to mince words here. This game looks awesome. Red Alert has got a couple of defining aspects, and one of them is that the developers understood that they couldn’t do “good” FMV. No matter how hard they tried it always came out cheesy. And if they tried to fight this and Take Themselves Seriously, they produced nigh-unwatchable stuff…like Command & Conquer 2.

So the Red Alert guys just decided to turn the Cheese Knob until it broke off, and Red Alert 3 continues this tradition with pride.

“Are you ready to send those commies runnin’ back to their mommies?” Yes. Yes, I am. And frankly, that’s a hell of a cast. Tim Curry, George Takei, J. K. Simmons, Jonathan Pryce…and the best part is, they’re into it. They understand that the scenery here is meant to be eaten. The only downside is Jenny McCarthy as Tanya. Yes, I know, Kari Wuhrer wasn’t available…but could they have at least dyed her hair? Tanya is not a blonde! I guess it’ll come down to how well she can yell “Shake it baby!” Given her background…probably pretty well.

And fortunately the gameplay looks like it’s going to have some interesting quirks as well (plus some of the best-looking water I’ve ever seen):

Building bases on the ocean? Amphibious engineers? Transforming mechs? Artillery that shoots soldiers? DO WANT.

Oh, and a quick Braid update: Megan has completed the game and is now searching for the secret stars. After finding one yesterday she raised her hands in triumph and exclaimed, “Yes! I am the master of space and time!” I think it was worth buying the game just for that.