Category: Cool People

The Fundamental Disconnect of Computer RPGs

I’ve mentioned earlier that I try to keep negativity off this blog. I also try not to read blogs that I consider overly negative, and yet one of the blogs I do read is Scorpia’s.

Scorpia is the grande dame of adventure/roleplaying. She got her start reviewing adventure and computer roleplaying games for Computer Gaming World decades ago. I always enjoyed reading her reviews, especially when she would gleefully excoriate some piece of crap she’d been forced to play. After CGW dropped her she got a web presence and kept going.

Now, Scorpia’s got two themes that she constantly returns to. The first is that CRPGs today suck compared to those of the past. The second is that CRPGs never seem to turn out as good as the paper-and-pencil RPGs she plays. And while she’s technically right on both counts, in the end complaining about them isn’t particularly useful.

It’s not useful to complain about the first because the first is all perception. In the end, CRPGs today are much better than their older counterparts. The problem is that back in The Day(tm), the genre was still being explored. Games could still surprise us with new methods of pulling us in. Older CRPGs used lots of tricks to suggest that the world didn’t strictly revolve around the player. I recall running across a random fight between a group of bandits and the town guards in Ultima VI and thinking, “Whoa, what is going on in this world that I don’t know about?” Answer: nothing, but the suggestion was there. Did I have the same experience when the same thing happened in Oblivion? Of course not.

Now those tricks can still work, but only on younger players who haven’t Seen It All like us grognards. Which is why, ultimately, complaining about this is futile.

It’s also not useful to complain about the second because of the dirty little secret of computer role-playing games. Which is that there’s no such thing as a computer role-playing game.

There are two aspects to paper-and-pencil role-playing. The first is the numerical aspect – the stats, the skills, the to-hit percentage and the amount of damage done per attack, as well as the improvements to all these numbers as the character progresses. Computers do this scintillatingly well, but in the end this isn’t roleplaying. It’s just character bookkeeping.

The other aspect of paper-and-pencil role-playing is collaborative storytelling between the players and the game master. Computers cannot do this at all and they’ll never be able to ever ever ever ever. Well, at least not until artificial intelligence is perfected and by then we’ll all be too busy running for our lives from the hunter-killer robots.

The best a computer “RPG” can possibly do is to marry a good pre-programmed story with a fun iteration of character bookkeeping. That’s it, and that’s all there will ever be. I guess this doesn’t bother me as much as it does her because I was never able to do as much paper-and-pencil roleplaying as I wanted. When I was growing up I got maybe one real roleplaying session a year, and the rest of the time I’d have to scratch my itch by playing solo RPG adventures like the Fighting Fantasy gamebooks. Which, goshwow, married good pre-programmed stories with fun iterations of character bookkeeping. So the transition to CRPGs wasn’t a painful one for me.

But this is the root of Scorpia’s dissatisfaction. I think she’d be happier if she either stopped playing them or stopped expecting them to be something they never can.


The Arsecast

The Arsecast is a podcast by Graham Goring that covers news and reviews of retro and indie games. I found out about the Arsecast a few months ago just as he released episode eight…in which he announced that he was stopping. So I didn’t feel the need to link him then. Fortunately he is continuing the podcast in a new format with Bob Fearon, and thus I feel secure that if I link to the podcast now there will be new stuff in the future.

Now, I try to keep the swearing and negativity on this blog to a minimum. Graham, being British, does no such thing. He glories in eviscerating bad games, usually with the foulest language possible. He is also quite effusive with his praise when a game merits it…though the language typically isn’t any better.

Needless to say, he’s absolutely hysterical. I can’t wait for him to review Planitia.

So go listen. Just make sure you’re eighteen. Or maybe twenty-one. Heck, sometimes I feel I’m not mature enough to listen to the Arsecast…


Cave Story

I’d heard that Cave Story was a stupendous free game from Japanese developer Pixel, but I only recently got around to trying it.

I want you to close your eyes and imagine. You’re ten years old again. It’s Saturday morning in the middle of summer vacation. Just last night your parents finally gave in and bought you that game that all your friends have been raving about for the last month. Your mother isn’t going to bug you; on the contrary, she’s looking forward to having eight uninterrupted hours to herself. You’ve just finished your bowl of Choco-Bombs and you’ve settled in front of the TV with your NES (or SNES, depending on how old you are). You plug the game in and turn on the console, picking up the controller with trembling fingers…

Do you remember? Good. Now go play Cave Story, because it will make you feel that way again.

(Get the Deluxe Package, it’s the easiest way to start playing the game. And use a gamepad if at all possible).


Master of None

2001 was the year I seriously decided to become a game developer.

I’d had aspirations of doing so for almost my entire life, but 2001 was the year my son David was born. That was when I had to face the fact that I probably wasn’t going to be able to support a family of four on game tester money.

Having a family made it simultaneously harder and easier to become a programmer. No, there would be no week-long eat/sleep/code stints for me. But at the same time the knowledge that I needed to do more for my family prompted me to work harder, learn what I needed to know and come out of my shell enough to get the job I wanted.

But I had read voraciously about programmers like John Carmack…prodigies who understood code in a way other people just can’t. I had long felt disheartened because I knew I’d never get to that level and it seemed (from my reading) that it was necessary to do so in order to succeed.

Actually getting a game development job disabused me of a lot of that notion, and subsequently I decided that while I couldn’t be a master at anything, I could at least get a little familiar with everything.

I wrote Inaria because I’d never written an RPG engine. I wrote Planitia because I’d never written a 3D RTS. While neither game makes me an expert, I can now be an asset to a team writing either type of game.

There’s a saying: “The jack of all trades is a master of none.” In that form, it seems to suggest that it’s better to master a single subject than be competent in several. But that’s actually a shortened form of the original saying, which was: “Jack of all trades, master of none, though ofttimes better than master of one.”

Because frankly, how often do you need a master of something?

Carmack sneered at the 3D engine Tim Sweeney wrote for Unreal, but it worked well enough, didn’t it? Well enough to create a multi-million selling series of games that made Epic (and Sweeney) a lot of money.

Indeed, Carmack’s mastery of 3D engine development isn’t standing him in much stead these days. He called his work on Doom 3 “pretty damn boring”. That’s why he’s writing Java games for phones now.

So it seemed to me that I made the right decision.

And now this article from Dilbert creator Scott Adams says the same thing! It gives external validation to something I believe internally, and thus, I like it!


The Indie Thing

Soundly situated in obscurityland
Famous in inverse proportion to how cool I am
And should I ever garner triple-digit fans
You can tell me then there’s someone I ain’t indier than
MC Frontalot, Indier Than Thou

I’ve had a love/hate relationship with the indie gaming scene for a while.

The love, of course, comes from appreciating and identifying with people who can make games in their spare time.

The hate comes from…

Well, it’s complicated.

But it’s basically all Steve Pavlina‘s fault.

See, Steve ran Dexterity Software back in The Day(tm). He had forums on his site (like any good small developer who understands that building a community is just as important as making games). Those forums attracted a lot of other people who wanted to follow Steve’s path…thus, they became the unofficial “indie developer” forums.

But then Steve stopped making games and closed the forum down. The indies needed a new forum, so they created one. They named it the Indiegamer Forums.

That was their first mistake.

Why? Because by overtly stating “This board is for indies only” they made it necessary to define what an “indie” is…and there are lots of definitions.

And thus, there has been a lot of heat generated on the board over the years as people do things that “betray the indie code”…as perceived by some of the main posters there. Lots of people have run afoul of this over the years…usually for doing completely prudent things necessary to keep themselves in business.

That’s not to say that there’s nothing good there. That’s not true. But the board has been susceptible to vituperation in the past and that’s why I don’t read it any more, even though I’m allegedly their target audience.

Example? Well, here’s a good one: GameTunnel, the leading indie game review site, recently released their Top 100 Independent Games list. A list like this is always going to be contentious, but there’s one game that absolutely should be on that list and isn’t.

And that game is Stardock’s Galactic Civilizations II.

Why isn’t it? Well, this just goes straight back to their “What is an indie?” problem. Stardock is too “big”. They can get retail deals based on the strength of their past games. They have their own Steam-style system for purchasing and downloading games directly over the internet. Their stuff gets reviewed by all the major gaming sites. Thus they aren’t indie. “Indie” to the denizens of the Indiegamer Forums is one guy in his bedroom making whatever he wants (er…as long as he doesn’t dare make a “casual” game).

Of course, that’s exactly how Stardock started. And Stardock has never sold themselves.

They fulfill my requirements for indie – no one can tell them what to make and no one can tell them when to ship.

It’s pretty obvious to me that Stardock is an indie gaming company that has simply made real good.

And now Retro64 has been purchased by PopCap. Retro64 is owned by Mike Boeh, a consummate indie developer and the creator, maintainer and host of…the Indiegamer Forums. Retro64 also hosts Game Tunnel.

PopCap has long been decried on the Indiegamer Forums as a corporatized clone-making machine; a company that cares only about money and simply steals every good game idea they come across. Go ahead, search for “PopCap” and “Zuma” on the forums and see what you get.

Mike has escaped the white-hot backlash his “selling out” would normally have generated on the forums because he’s the host – and frankly, everybody likes him. He’s a great guy. But lots of people are seeing this as yet another “true indie” swallowed up by the machine. And although Mike has made it clear that the forums and Game Tunnel were not part of the acquisition, some are wondering what their future can possibly be if the company hosting them is now owned by a “corporate clone monster”.

Frankly I think it’s all much ado about nothing. PopCap could not possibly gain from shutting down GameTunnel and the Indiegamer Forums; and if they threatened to do so those sites would simply move.

But then that’s the other aspect of “indie” that they embrace…the idea of the renegade programmer, coming up with radical new ideas that The Man(tm) will eventually either have to steal…or destroy. ‘Cause you know, the indie scene is the only place where true innovation can take place.

Please. Sometimes I feel like yelling, “Just shut up and make your games!” Though frankly I should take my own advice.


Planitia Update 19: It looks exactly the same!

But, thanks to lots of help from Ryan, the frame rate has easily doubled. This should mean that I can go ahead and add particles and god powers and not have to worry about the frame rate any more. Note that I said “should”…

And if you’re an artist or modeller, check out Ryan’s new utility CrazyBump. It “creates normal maps directly from textures”. Not being an artist I don’t know what that means, but lots of people seem to like it.


Cheese…Of…Destiny!

This is the story of a cheese.

The story begins, like all great stories, with a road trip. This one was to GenCon 2000 in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. Only…I didn’t get to go.

Back then I was working at Human Code as a tester. There were two other guys with me in the test department, Nathan Regener and Scott Hazle (whom we called Shazle for short). All three of us were avid gamers. All three of us wanted to go to GenCon. But somebody had to stay behind and do the work.

Guess who that ended up being.

Okay, I’m not bitter. I really couldn’t have afforded to go anyway, so it wasn’t that big a loss. But since our boss was out as well, I ended up spending the week alone, working on a huge project that was already overdue. I ended up working about eighty hours that week and was feeling pretty unappreciated by the time they got back.

So, Tuesday morning, Nathan, Shazle and Jeremy (friend from another office who also went) waltz in. They unload the usual armfuls of posters, programs, book covers, tchotkes, etc. as well as copies of the Dungeons & Dragons Third Edition Player’s Handbook. I’m suitably impressed.

Then they pull out the Package. Now, I am fully aware of the custom of Wisconsin football fans, so I knew exactly what it was: a cheesehead. You know, one of those silly cheese-wedge-shaped hats that Packer fans wear to games. They told me that if I opened the package, I would have to wear it. Being in my right mind, I then refused to open the package until they threatened me with pointy implements.

I was right and wrong at the same time. It had started as a cheesehead. But it had become a magical artifact – a powerstone, in fact, charged with the essence of dozens of writers, game designers, artists, and other cool people.

And now I present the Cheesehead to you.

Pictures of the entire Cheesehead are coming. In the meantime, I was able to scan its various surfaces to bring you the individual signatures. Clicking on a name will give you a closeup of that signature and the story behind it.

The Top:

The Beginning

Richard Le Parmentier
Dave Arneson
Greg Stafford
Ramon Perez
John Kovalic
Neil Barret, Jr.
Tracy Hickman
Peter Woodward

The Curved Side:

Andrew Greenberg
Gary Gygax
Sam Wood
Phil Foglio
Owen Seyler

The Right Side:

Aaron Williams
Unknown Two
Kate Novak
Christian Moore
K.W. Jeter
Katherine Murphy
Todd Lockwood

The Left Side:

Toivo Rovainen
Kaja Foglio
Michael A. Stackpole
Jeff Grubb
Shane Hensley
James Ernest
I’m From Chicago – I Don’t Do Cheese
J. Michael Strazinsky

The Bottom:

Dave Mattingly

People We Didn’t Get To Sign

The Beginning

Nathan: No shit, there we were. GenCon 2000. It was me, Shazle and Jeremy. The decision having been made to get something for Anthony, we embarked on a quest to find the most heinous item we could. I came up with the idea of the classic Wisconsin cheesehead…

Shazle: No, we were at the mall and saw them and thought, “You know, Anthony wouldn’t want one of those. Let’s get one for him.”

Jeremy: What I remember is that we were at the mall and they fucking closed on us and we went to three different restaurants and we ended up eating at this Japanese place and we were leaving and laughing about how Anthony was at home doing all the work and we decided to get him something and Nathan said “cheesehead” and I said cool, but what we needed to do was write “My Stupid Friends Went To GenCon 2000 And All They Got Me Was This Stupid Cheesehead” on it and then we should get signatures from everybody we could. And then I went off and spent the rest of the time hanging with Melanie, so…

Nathan: So me and Shazle did all the work.

Nathan: Everyone met this with a degree of surprise and occasional dismay. But everyone took it well and seemed happy enough to be signing something that wasn’t a picture of themselves or their own art that they’d seen a million times. A lot of them took a little extra time and chatted just because of the break in routine. Even if we don’t have something special to say about them, everyone was great about it. A finer group of people I couldn’t have met.


John Kovalic

John Kovalic – Creator of Dork Tower, Wild Life and various other comics.

Nathan: He touched my ass. No, he was very nice. He chuckled a bit and signed the damn cheese.


Tracy Hickman

Tracy Hickman – Fantasy author; co-creator of Dragonlance.


Dave Arneson

Dave Arneson – Co-creator of Dungeons and Dragons.

Nathan: He was sitting there looking so bored before we got there. Then we said “Sign our cheese!” He laughed a lot and signed it. Then he yelled, “Photo opportunity!” He put it on and danced around while random assorted hangers-on took pictures. It was actually kind of disturbing.

Anthony: I can’t help but think that one of those pictures would make a wonderful companion piece. Hint, hint to our audience!


Ramon Perez

Ramon Perez – One of the main artists for Palladium.

Nathan: I knew Ramon through another set of friends. He’s Canadian.


Greg Stafford

Greg Stafford – Creator of the world of Glorantha.

Nathan: He touched my ass.


Richard Le Parmentier

Richard Le Parmentier – Played Admiral Motti in Star Wars: A New Hope. Told off Darth Vader and got choked – you know the guy.

Shazle: He heard about the cheese prior to us showing up. We had acquired a small reputation by then – and this was when we were only about halfway done. He told us he had never signed a cheese before. He was English, and didn’t know exactly what it was, so we explained it to him. He was familiar with the concept of “rabid football fan”, though.


Peter Woodward

Peter Woodward – Played Galan on Babylon 5: Crusade.

Nathan: He touched my ass.

Shazle: He was autographing his Babylon 5 card or face shots for ten bucks.

Nathan: We walked up and handed him the cheese and he said, “Oh wow. I’ve never charged for signing a cheese before, I don’t think I should start now.” And he signed it for free.


Neil Barret, Jr.

Neil Barret, Jr. – Writer

Nathan: He was a writer. He did not seem amused. He was kinda cranky. He was the only one.

Shazle: He was at the booth with Michael Stackpole and K.W. Jeter.

Right Side:


K.W. Jeter

K.W. Jeter – Writer.

Nathan: Writer who was at the same booth as Michael Stackpole and Neil Barret, Jr.


Aaron Williams

Aaron Williams – Creator of Nodwick.

Nathan: Kovalic handed it to him when he was done and he signed it.

Aaron Williams: It was the most challenging surface I’ve had to draw on, I must say. I barely made it out of the faux-swiss divots with my arm intact. I recommend that beginners practice signing styrofoam packaging before they attempt this feat themselves. 馃檪


Kate Novak

Kate Novak – Writer. Co-creator of the Finder’s Stone Trilogy.


Christian Moore – Line designer for Star Trek, and one of the founders of Last Unicorn Games.


Katherine Murphy

Katherine Murphy

Shazle: She’s a vampire LARP player from Milwaukee. She’s 21.

Nathan: Cute girl named Kat who hung out with us for most of the convention.


We dunno...

Unknown 2: We don’t know.

Anthony: But someone out there probably does. Fill us in, please!


Todd Lockwood

Todd Lockwood – One of the conceptual artists for D&D3. Big red dragon on page 124 of PHB.

Shazle: He saw that Sam Wood had already drawn on it and said, “Damn, now I have to draw on it.”


The Curved Side:

Andrew Greenberg

Andrew Greenburg – One of the primary writers on Fading Suns.

Nathan: Really nice guy. He’s recognized me at the con for two years running. Had a great time with his devil (marketing guy) last year.


Gary Gygax

Gary Gygax – Co-creator of Dungeons & Dragons.

Nathan: The man who first brought me to Satan worship…no, he was really nice. He seemed genuinely touched when I thanked him for fifteen years worth of entertainment. And then he genuinely touched my ass.


Sam Wood

Sam Wood – Conceptual artist for D&D3.

Shazle: He was actually the first person to start drawing on it.


Phil Foglio

Phil Foglio – Artist of such great talent and so many things that to try to summarize him is to do a disservice.

Nathan: Laughed very hard.


Owen Seyler

Owen Seyler – Line Editor and primary designer for the Dune RPG for Last Unicorn Games.

Nathan: I gotta tell the LUG story. Back in ’92-’93, I was at Apple doing tech support and I get a call from these guys having problems with fonts. So I take the call and get their name and what company they’re with – turns out they are with Last Unicorn Games, and I was reading through Aria: Canticle of the Monomyth right when they called. So I started chatting with them and when Heresy came out (this was back when everyone was getting on the CCG bandwagon) I started demoing for them. Then I started playtesting Dune: The CCG for them. So they ended up paying my way into the first GenCon I ever attended. And we’ve been pals ever since. This year, when I got them to sign my copy of the Dune RPG, they signed it “To Nathan: You will be known as Usul among us.” Which I thought was awful damn nice of them.


Toivo Rovainen

Toivo Rovainen – Artist and Collator for Cheapass Games.


Kaja Foglio

Kaja Foglio – Phil Foglio’s wife and artist of many Magic cards.

Nathan: She’s…just…cute. I mean, really cute. Actually, they were rooming about four doors down from us our group and theirs all went down on the elevator together.

Shazle: And, of course, Nathan says “Okay, whose hand was that?”

Nathan: Now, I was standing in the back of the elevator. Kaja was at the very front, and she pipes right up, “Oh, that was mine. Sorry.”

Shazle: And Nathan replies, “Oh, I’m not.”


Michael Stackpole

Michael A. Stackpole – Writer extroadinarie.

Nathan: The first person who signed.

Shazle: No, the second. K.W. Jeter was the first. Well, all three of them signed it at once, I guess.


Jeff Grub

Jeff Grubb – Longtime TSR writer and fantasy author.


Shane Hensley

Shane Hensley – Creator of Deadlands at Pinnacle Entertainment.

Nathan: He seemed a little surprised when I whipped out the cheese.


James Ernest

James Ernest – Cheapass Games.

Nathan: I spent a bit of time with him hanging out. Really nice. Got to play his new game “Vegas, or Jame Ernest Writes Off Another Trip To Vegas” – that was fun. He signed it “US Government Property” just because he’s funny that way.


I Don't Do Cheese.

I’m From Chicago – I Don’t Do Cheese

Nathan: Cute girl at this booth that sold swords and assorted jewelry. She’s one of the people I’ve hung out with at GenCons past.

Anthony: It’s just reassuring to know that whatever she’s doing right now, it’s not cheese.


J. Michael Straczynski

J. Michael Strazinsky – Creator of Babylon Five.

Nathan: The first time I went up to him I just shook his hand and said, “Thanks for improving the quality of science fiction as a whole in the last decade.” I apologized then because I didn’t have anything for him to sign. The second time through, he seemed to recognize me, and chuckled when I whipped out the cheese. Then he touched my ass.

The Bottom:


Dave Mattingly

Dave Mattingly – Writer for ezhero.com.

Nathan: Not the baseball player. Just some guy I’ve played some games with.

Anthony: I think that’s Don Mattingly.

Nathan: Shut the hell up.


People we didn’t get to sign it:

Anthony Daniels (C3PO) – Twenty bucks for a signature on anything. If you bought a picture of him for twenty bucks, you got the signature for free.

Chris Druschel (Sysadmin at Wizards of the Coast) – We were never able to get him and the cheese in the same room. We suspect he’s the anti-cheese. We watched him possibly drink himself into a better job.

Johnathan Tweet (Designer for Dungeons & Dragons, Third Edition) – Nobody could find him during the entire con. Pity.


Credit Where It’s Due…

I forgot to mention that the terrible Cybermage audition was provided by Henry Kropf. Thanks, Henry! I’d been looking for that sound file for years.


Planitia Update 16: Involuntary Game Makeover

(We now join an episode of Involuntary Game Makeover already in progress.)

Laurie: -and let’s see who we can find-

Bert: Oh, oh, yes-

Laurie: -definite candidate right here; Good evening, miss, what’s your name?

Planitia: Huh?

Laurie: What’s your name, miss?

Planitia: Oh…Planitia.

Laurie: Well, that’s certainly unique. (makes a face at the camera)

Bert: Okay, well, let’s take a look at you…

Planitia is coming together.

Laurie: Oh dear God…who picked out those textures?!

Planitia: My programmer…?

Bert: Programmer art.

Laurie: In this day and age.

Bert: One would think he cared more.

Planitia (irate): Hey, my programmer loves me!

Laurie: If he loved you, sweetie, he wouldn’t let you go out looking like that.

Planitia: Okay, okay. They’re old textures and they don’t really match. I know, I’m a fashion disaster.

Laurie: Oh, no, dear. You’re not a fashion disaster. You’re not even a fashion catastrophe. You, my dear, are a fashion apocalypse. If we let you walk around like that –

Bert: It will eventually unmake the universe.

Planitia (sobbing): He did the best he could!

Laurie: Well, now it’s time to see what a professional can do. J贸n?

(Enter J贸n Kristinsson riding a dazzling white horse. His shirt is unbuttoned down to his navel, showing much manly chest hair.)

J贸n (in a vaguely Scandinavian accent): These are for you, my dear. I can’t wait to see how you look in them.

Planitia (swooning): Th-thank you, sir.

Bert: All right, let’s hustle her off to the dressing room; the show’s only a half-hour.

Laurie: And it turns out that your programmer gave us these accessories to complete your outfit.

Planitia: Gasp! Lighting! And alpha blending! And moving water! I’ve been wishing for these for ages! I told you he loved me!

Bert: Okay, sweetums, ready to dazzle us?

Planitia: Hang on a second, just let me finish adjusting these UV coordinates…all right, here I come!

Planitia is coming together.

Planitia: Oh my god! I’m beautiful! I’m beautiful!

Laurie: You always were sweetie. You always were.


And now you know what I’ve been doing for the past month. Graphics programming is deadly addictive stuff. Once you get a taste you do not want to stop because even small changes can have a big effect on how your game looks. Fortunately, I’m now extremely happy with how the game looks. I never thought it could look this good, and it’s almost all due to J贸n Kristinsson, who volunteered to provide me with some greatly improved textures free of charge. He is a prince among men and smells real nice too. Check out everything on his site, and then hire him for your next project, ’cause he’s teh awesmoe!

So, the good news is that Planitia looks much better.

The bad news is when J贸n waved those textures in my face and led me down the garden path of graphics, it seriously distracted me from my gameplay programming.

Thus, Planitia is probably going to end up pushed back again.

But it looks so pretty I couldn’t help it. And if I just added another layer of textures…no, NO! Must be strong! It’s time Planitia became a game rather than a tech demo.


I’m Stupid

Holy Crap, why didn’t I think of this?